I was considering posting a new entry this evening, but due to a bed frame crunching my finger, I have thus decided to yield a single question:
Why are we selective while making friends?
2 comments:
Anonymous
said...
I think we are selective for a lot of reasons. One, to find people similar to us. Two to find people that compliment us (as in help us be more complete, not just.. you have a nice shirt on).
My other thought on this is that the term friend is used a little too loosely most of the time. I think in general, we confuse being friendly with being friends. I think you can be friendly with a multitude of people, have a lot of aquaintances, but only a few friends. Friends are people that will love you no matter what, speak truth to you even when it is uncomfortable and hold your hand when you are weary (as in the story of moses having his hands held by two other people in order to win a battle... good story.. look it up).
I think also, sometimes we have a gut feeling that a person might do something that we may not need or be hurt from, so we tend to build up walls to protect ourselves from those people too. There is a delicate balance in the whole friend catagory.
I believe that we are selective because we don't want to be hurt, we don't want to feel the pain that we feel some may confront us with. I know it is quite easy to just be friendly (as Donna put it) to people, to just smile and give them a compliment instead of getting into a deep conversation. We too often pass up getting to know a person by just a simple answer..."I'm ok." I find myself using this too often with people I am not completely comfortable pouring myself out to.
I know that "friend" is a term that is used repeatedly. The meaning of a frined, sometimes being lost within the word. I have found that a friend is a person that is behind you all of the time, someone who is your shoulder to cry on, your hand to hold, your company in a laughing fit over silly things, your guidance to choose the right path, and your safe...we confide in our true friends, we trust them with our precious thoughts and our priceless feelings, in order to make a friend, first we must get to know them as aquaintances, how else are we supposed to understand them if we don't truly know them.
Call me sometime if you have anymore questions...they make me think.
2 comments:
I think we are selective for a lot of reasons. One, to find people similar to us. Two to find people that compliment us (as in help us be more complete, not just.. you have a nice shirt on).
My other thought on this is that the term friend is used a little too loosely most of the time. I think in general, we confuse being friendly with being friends. I think you can be friendly with a multitude of people, have a lot of aquaintances, but only a few friends. Friends are people that will love you no matter what, speak truth to you even when it is uncomfortable and hold your hand when you are weary (as in the story of moses having his hands held by two other people in order to win a battle... good story.. look it up).
I think also, sometimes we have a gut feeling that a person might do something that we may not need or be hurt from, so we tend to build up walls to protect ourselves from those people too. There is a delicate balance in the whole friend catagory.
~Donna
I believe that we are selective because we don't want to be hurt, we don't want to feel the pain that we feel some may confront us with. I know it is quite easy to just be friendly (as Donna put it) to people, to just smile and give them a compliment instead of getting into a deep conversation. We too often pass up getting to know a person by just a simple answer..."I'm ok." I find myself using this too often with people I am not completely comfortable pouring myself out to.
I know that "friend" is a term that is used repeatedly. The meaning of a frined, sometimes being lost within the word. I have found that a friend is a person that is behind you all of the time, someone who is your shoulder to cry on, your hand to hold, your company in a laughing fit over silly things, your guidance to choose the right path, and your safe...we confide in our true friends, we trust them with our precious thoughts and our priceless feelings, in order to make a friend, first we must get to know them as aquaintances, how else are we supposed to understand them if we don't truly know them.
Call me sometime if you have anymore questions...they make me think.
~Jess
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